Nige meets the Ancestors

There are moments they say, where you cannot be sure where you are going if you don’t know where you’re from.

My direct origins are Liverpool Irish, but begin to scratch at the surface and pretty soon some remarkable tales begin to be told.

It seems the Nige’s are from a Dynastic Dynasty of Descendants, dating right back to when man stopped ascending, and began to descend as was the style of the day.

The first recorded Nige could be traced back two thousand years to the icy coastal towns of Scandanavia. To Olaf Nige the Seasick, the one who was always last to be picked for the Rape and Pillage missions because of his tendency to get ill walking through a puddle. The Nige clan though soon developed their sea legs and spread around the world.

We can trace the line directly to the infamous Nige Fawkes, the plotter who was arrested whilst trying to blow up a dinghy, and of course to the legendary Captain Horatio Nige, RN.

Captain Nige fought alongside Nelson at the Battle of Trafalgar. At least he would have done if it hadn’t been for his drinking problem, which saw him sail the wrong way, storm Gibraltar and take several apes as Prisoners of War.

There was of course the Legendary Nigeheart, who was famous for being more historically accurate than Mel Gibson. Nigeheart’s daughter was Nigella Queen of Pots, who would go on to get a prime time cookery show on the BBC.

But of course the greatest of them all was the might explorer Christopher Columnige, who sought fame and fortune by seeking a western passage to the Indies. Unfortunately for him it was 1975 and all that was waiting for him was the US Coastguard.

So, To where we began.

There are moments they say, where you cannot be sure where you are going if you don’t know where you’re from.

I’m Nige. I’m From Sussex. I’m Going to the Pub!